"Just like the phoenix, I will rise again"
Too actually think that some people will actually read it. Too actually think someone may enjoy what I write and if you do then do check my external blog which is updated more often.
Link can be find by Googling my name that you can see around the place.
Too actually think that some people will actually read it. Too actually think someone may enjoy what I write and if you do then do check my external blog which is updated more often.
Link can be find by Googling my name that you can see around the place.
Why My Blender Has No USB Port….
This is a post on my blog from ages pass. This post was posted by Patrick Merritt, a old college friend of mine. I know of the spelling mistakes he has made and I AIN'T gonna correct it. Patrick was a guest poster on my blog but quit for personal reasons on June 2007.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Patrick Merritt
The reasoning behind this is that if blenders came with USB ports they would be yet another thing that could be moved into the giant corporate clutches of Bill Gates.
This would soon result in Bill Gates stating that his operating system would result in the blender operating with the most user friendly interface ever designed and would do several other things that no other operating system could.
Of course this being the mighty Microsoft Windows corporate these claims would never actually matirialise into real life, either that or they would be so f--king difficult to implement.
that the effort would cause the user to instantly age ten years through the stress…
But besides this within 3 days of these blenders being relased and spread into unsuspecting, nieve households across the country somewhere, some spotty teenager has managed to hack the blenders!
Now he is installing the latest version of some nasty virus onto your blender wich results in several “blue lid of death” crashes random restarts and the lid popping up at random intervals coating the kitchen in bananna & fig smoothie.
So you format your blender (and in the process lose all your favorite pre programmed recipies, speed settings and all your favorite music tracks you’ve downloaded….) restart it and install an antivirus (Nortan 2007 Blender edition…..) which sets you back another £120 four times more than the cost of the blender.
But this is nothing compared to the horror of…..
POPUPS!!!!
So your mixing up a milkshake in your blender and all of a sudden a bloody cucumber appears in the blender with a lable saying “Would you like to try a free sample with this blend” naturally thinking its a stupid idea to add cucumber to your lovely bananna and fig milkshake (which i add you have now been waiting 3 weeks for).
“Are you sure?”
YES IM BLOODY SURE F--K OFF!!!
You click yes….
“You have just recived you free cucumber…..”
Dammit! the drinks ruined damm windows! damm popups! bin the blender with the USB port cos anything Bill Gates touches turns to s--t.
I wonder does a USB powered blender play tetris……..corporate
This would soon result in Bill Gates stating that his operating system would result in the blender operating with the most user friendly interface ever designed and would do several other things that no other operating system could.
Of course this being the mighty Microsoft Windows corporate these claims would never actually matirialise into real life, either that or they would be so f--king difficult to implement.
that the effort would cause the user to instantly age ten years through the stress…
But besides this within 3 days of these blenders being relased and spread into unsuspecting, nieve households across the country somewhere, some spotty teenager has managed to hack the blenders!
Now he is installing the latest version of some nasty virus onto your blender wich results in several “blue lid of death” crashes random restarts and the lid popping up at random intervals coating the kitchen in bananna & fig smoothie.
So you format your blender (and in the process lose all your favorite pre programmed recipies, speed settings and all your favorite music tracks you’ve downloaded….) restart it and install an antivirus (Nortan 2007 Blender edition…..) which sets you back another £120 four times more than the cost of the blender.
But this is nothing compared to the horror of…..
POPUPS!!!!
So your mixing up a milkshake in your blender and all of a sudden a bloody cucumber appears in the blender with a lable saying “Would you like to try a free sample with this blend” naturally thinking its a stupid idea to add cucumber to your lovely bananna and fig milkshake (which i add you have now been waiting 3 weeks for).
“Are you sure?”
YES IM BLOODY SURE F--K OFF!!!
You click yes….
“You have just recived you free cucumber…..”
Dammit! the drinks ruined damm windows! damm popups! bin the blender with the USB port cos anything Bill Gates touches turns to s--t.
I wonder does a USB powered blender play tetris……..corporate
Total Comments 6
Comments
 |  a blender with a usb port? |
  |
| |  Yep, you read it right |
| |
| | that's awkward |
| |
| |  I have heard of Coffee Heaters powered by USB, and acting as a 4 port USB hub, but a blender?? Makes no sense. This reminds me of the cars joke. |
| |
| | It is a joke <_< |
| |
| | You had me fooled |
| |
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